I think this mom hacked into my brain and discovered all my thoughts about children and school. I couldn't have said this better myself.
My "role" in all of this is to set up an environment that fosters and encourages creativity. A whole library of books, plenty of arts and craft supplies, wooden toys (that don't make noise and don't have batteries- these stifle creativity!), outside time, and room to breath!
I appreciate when she says that yes, children should learn to listen, complete a task, and focus on work...but our society's schooling mentality has come to believe that this is accomplished by forcing them into an over-scheduled and very tight box of living. Oddly enough, when left the room to create and truly LIVE, and when in a loving home environment that values virtue, children do learn these things.
But what do I know...my kids are 5 and under. This woman, however...she has 4 grown kids...she speaks from experience!
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Now where'd that "peace" run off to?
A couple weeks ago I wrote a post expressing a deep inner peace in which I had found myself encompassed. If you remember, I noted that I did not think it would, nor should, last very long. That peace that comes easy is a blessing, surely...or a glimpse, rather, of what we should be seeking ALL THE TIME, regardless of external circumstances or factors.
Well, at the time I wrote that post, I had just discovered that I was pregnant, and I was on cloud 9. I still am, in may ways...at least I'm sure that cloud is somewhere around here amidst all this exhaustion and nausea. And that's what happened. That's what knocked me off my peace horse. I am so tired ALL of the time. I wake up in the morning, and 15 minutes later I find myself wondering how much longer until nap time. And then the nausea...it comes in waves, hits at various points throughout the day, and in the middle of the night. Those mothers that have had similar symptoms in early pregnancy may relate when I say that such discomfort actually brings me comfort: the physical discomfort brings me emotional comfort that everything is working the way it should.
Regardless, I get stuck in this tunnel of muck. Its hard for me to see past the immediate condition of each day: the mess that I can't physically even begin to keep up with, the laundry that is not getting done, the dishes piling in the sink, the meals that aren't getting cooked, my husband's lunches that aren't getting pre-packed, and my children who are left to entertain themselves while I lay useless on the couch, or on the bathroom floor.
And then, there are those wonderful pregnancy emotions. I'm sure that adds to the apparent gloom I'm apt to feel. I try to remind myself this is just a phase, and before I know it I'll be back to my bubbly self delighting in the kids and their interests, and able to tend to the home. My husband, my wonderful husband, is so helpful, compassionate, understanding, and encouraging. And my kids really are doing well...the guilt is just all mine...I feel I should be doing more with them each day, like I was just 3 weeks ago. Alas, I physically cannot, and the emotional guilt sets in.
I'd like to believe that most of this is just in my head, and its not as bad as it sounds, but my oldest daughter innocently said something today that awakened me to just what its like from her side of the fence.
We had been out all day as a family, shuffling from one thing to another, when my husband, noticing my pure exhaustion and oncoming nausea, announced we'd be going out to dinner.
The kids all cheered, and the oldest said in amazement, "Really?! Again?!" (this would be the 2nd time this week).
I turned and I said to her, "Yes, we go out to eat more than usual when mommy's pregnant, nauseous, and tired, and its hard for me to cook."
Then came a response, meant compassionately, that sort of hurt, "I know mommy, and its just not easy that you have to care for THREE kids all the time."
My heart sank. I whipped around to face her in the car and said, "Oh, baby, I know mommy's been tired and sick lately, but caring for you 3 is my FAVORITE thing to do, its the best thing I've done my entire life, and I LOVE caring for you. I LOVE you SO MUCH!" (she did return a great big smile and a "I love you, too").
I know she was trying to be compassionate, but I was left feeling horrible that my children somehow got that message by my recent behavior. Have I really been lamenting THAT much about every day duties that my oldest feels that caring for them is a BURDEN?
And then my pregnancy hormones took those emotions someplace dark...someplace I knew I had to get out of fast. I could not stay down there wallowing about that, allowing myself to feel down and depressed about it. I concluded that I need to do 3 things: 1) hug my children A LOT more, and even if I don't feel well somehow let them know that they are still the most important persons in the world (even if its saying "yes" to a book), 2) forgive myself and lower my expectations of what I can reasonably accomplish during this first trimester, and 3) resolve to choose joy.
Here I am, realizing now is that time I need to rekindle that inner peace I experienced a couple weeks ago...that profound joy. Perhaps that's why the Lord allowed me to feel it, so that I would know what I needed to seek during this time. I am always moved to hear about people facing life-threatening illnesses who announce their peace and joy even through their suffering. Next to what they face, my situation seems trivial. How can I find that peace? How can I choose it?
Well, at the time I wrote that post, I had just discovered that I was pregnant, and I was on cloud 9. I still am, in may ways...at least I'm sure that cloud is somewhere around here amidst all this exhaustion and nausea. And that's what happened. That's what knocked me off my peace horse. I am so tired ALL of the time. I wake up in the morning, and 15 minutes later I find myself wondering how much longer until nap time. And then the nausea...it comes in waves, hits at various points throughout the day, and in the middle of the night. Those mothers that have had similar symptoms in early pregnancy may relate when I say that such discomfort actually brings me comfort: the physical discomfort brings me emotional comfort that everything is working the way it should.
Regardless, I get stuck in this tunnel of muck. Its hard for me to see past the immediate condition of each day: the mess that I can't physically even begin to keep up with, the laundry that is not getting done, the dishes piling in the sink, the meals that aren't getting cooked, my husband's lunches that aren't getting pre-packed, and my children who are left to entertain themselves while I lay useless on the couch, or on the bathroom floor.
And then, there are those wonderful pregnancy emotions. I'm sure that adds to the apparent gloom I'm apt to feel. I try to remind myself this is just a phase, and before I know it I'll be back to my bubbly self delighting in the kids and their interests, and able to tend to the home. My husband, my wonderful husband, is so helpful, compassionate, understanding, and encouraging. And my kids really are doing well...the guilt is just all mine...I feel I should be doing more with them each day, like I was just 3 weeks ago. Alas, I physically cannot, and the emotional guilt sets in.
I'd like to believe that most of this is just in my head, and its not as bad as it sounds, but my oldest daughter innocently said something today that awakened me to just what its like from her side of the fence.
We had been out all day as a family, shuffling from one thing to another, when my husband, noticing my pure exhaustion and oncoming nausea, announced we'd be going out to dinner.
The kids all cheered, and the oldest said in amazement, "Really?! Again?!" (this would be the 2nd time this week).
I turned and I said to her, "Yes, we go out to eat more than usual when mommy's pregnant, nauseous, and tired, and its hard for me to cook."
Then came a response, meant compassionately, that sort of hurt, "I know mommy, and its just not easy that you have to care for THREE kids all the time."
My heart sank. I whipped around to face her in the car and said, "Oh, baby, I know mommy's been tired and sick lately, but caring for you 3 is my FAVORITE thing to do, its the best thing I've done my entire life, and I LOVE caring for you. I LOVE you SO MUCH!" (she did return a great big smile and a "I love you, too").
I know she was trying to be compassionate, but I was left feeling horrible that my children somehow got that message by my recent behavior. Have I really been lamenting THAT much about every day duties that my oldest feels that caring for them is a BURDEN?
And then my pregnancy hormones took those emotions someplace dark...someplace I knew I had to get out of fast. I could not stay down there wallowing about that, allowing myself to feel down and depressed about it. I concluded that I need to do 3 things: 1) hug my children A LOT more, and even if I don't feel well somehow let them know that they are still the most important persons in the world (even if its saying "yes" to a book), 2) forgive myself and lower my expectations of what I can reasonably accomplish during this first trimester, and 3) resolve to choose joy.
Here I am, realizing now is that time I need to rekindle that inner peace I experienced a couple weeks ago...that profound joy. Perhaps that's why the Lord allowed me to feel it, so that I would know what I needed to seek during this time. I am always moved to hear about people facing life-threatening illnesses who announce their peace and joy even through their suffering. Next to what they face, my situation seems trivial. How can I find that peace? How can I choose it?
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
My favorite education author
This weekend we completely cleaned out, decluttered, and reorganized our office, with the help of some new shelves from IKEA. It is a relief to have this finished!
In the process, I came across the books I have mentioned before that I had lost for some time: those of John Holt, "Learning all the Time," "How Children Learn," and "How Children Fail."
He is without mistake my favorite author on the education of children. Without even knowing it, his approach hits on a core understanding of the whole human person, how the Creator Himself designed us with a desire for knowledge and an amazing ability to use the resources around us to learn.
I want to share briefly (and I will try to be brief) a few excerpts from the first part of "Learning all the Time" that I have enjoyed this morning. If they appeal to you, by all means, order the book! I'll venture to say you won't regret it.
In John Holt's words:
"[This] book will be a demonstration that children, without being coerced or manipulated, or being put in exotic, specially prepared environments, or having their thinking planned or ordered for them, can, will, and do pick up from the world around them important information about what we call the Basics. It will also demonstrate that "ordinary" people, without special training and often without large amounts of schooling themselves, can give their children whatever slight assistance may be needed to help them in their exploration of the world, and that to do this task requires no more than a little tact, patience, attention, and readily available information."
And on the following page, "This is not a book about 'How to Help Your Child Succeed in School.' It is a book about children learning By learning I mean making more sense of the world around them. (let me try this again) Learning, to me, means making more sense of the world around us, and being able to do more things in it. Success in school means remembering the answers to teacher's questions, getting clever about guessing what answers they will ask, and about how to fool them when you don't know the answers. In this book I will for the most part be discussing...things we might do to make various aspects of the world more accessible, interesting, and transparent to children."
The first chapter, which I am currently re-reading, and enjoying just as much if not more than the first time I read it 5 years ago, is on Reading and Trust, Discovering Letters, Exploring words, and true reading readiness. It is filled with Holt's own interesting observations and experiences as a well-known and largely respected educator of his time (this book was written in the 80's).
O, how it lays my mind at ease and puts me in the proper mindset to approach my children with an attitude that far better supports THEM, as PERSONS, searching for confidence and support as they embark into the wonderful world of print.
Rest assured, I am not turning this blog into an education-philosophy blog. But this is a part of who I am, a part deeply intertwined in my faith, by which I have found gives breath and life to the truth of the human person as taught by the Church. By approaching the education of my children in this way, with this basis, I am testifying to the Love of Christ in them because I am understanding, respecting, and appreciating each one's unique and amazing ability TO LEARN without ME (or anyone for that matter) being one who teaches them to split back answers without truly understanding, without truly learning. Every day, my husband and I pray that we will educate our children in such a way that gives Glory to the Lord, and best prepares them for the unique vocation He has for each of them. And this is the path we're being led on. This is where Christ is leading us. Us. Our unique family. And so we leap forward in confidence, looking always to Christ as we go along, and being open to how He leads us.
In the process, I came across the books I have mentioned before that I had lost for some time: those of John Holt, "Learning all the Time," "How Children Learn," and "How Children Fail."
He is without mistake my favorite author on the education of children. Without even knowing it, his approach hits on a core understanding of the whole human person, how the Creator Himself designed us with a desire for knowledge and an amazing ability to use the resources around us to learn.
I want to share briefly (and I will try to be brief) a few excerpts from the first part of "Learning all the Time" that I have enjoyed this morning. If they appeal to you, by all means, order the book! I'll venture to say you won't regret it.
In John Holt's words:
"[This] book will be a demonstration that children, without being coerced or manipulated, or being put in exotic, specially prepared environments, or having their thinking planned or ordered for them, can, will, and do pick up from the world around them important information about what we call the Basics. It will also demonstrate that "ordinary" people, without special training and often without large amounts of schooling themselves, can give their children whatever slight assistance may be needed to help them in their exploration of the world, and that to do this task requires no more than a little tact, patience, attention, and readily available information."
And on the following page, "This is not a book about 'How to Help Your Child Succeed in School.' It is a book about children learning By learning I mean making more sense of the world around them. (let me try this again) Learning, to me, means making more sense of the world around us, and being able to do more things in it. Success in school means remembering the answers to teacher's questions, getting clever about guessing what answers they will ask, and about how to fool them when you don't know the answers. In this book I will for the most part be discussing...things we might do to make various aspects of the world more accessible, interesting, and transparent to children."
The first chapter, which I am currently re-reading, and enjoying just as much if not more than the first time I read it 5 years ago, is on Reading and Trust, Discovering Letters, Exploring words, and true reading readiness. It is filled with Holt's own interesting observations and experiences as a well-known and largely respected educator of his time (this book was written in the 80's).
O, how it lays my mind at ease and puts me in the proper mindset to approach my children with an attitude that far better supports THEM, as PERSONS, searching for confidence and support as they embark into the wonderful world of print.
Rest assured, I am not turning this blog into an education-philosophy blog. But this is a part of who I am, a part deeply intertwined in my faith, by which I have found gives breath and life to the truth of the human person as taught by the Church. By approaching the education of my children in this way, with this basis, I am testifying to the Love of Christ in them because I am understanding, respecting, and appreciating each one's unique and amazing ability TO LEARN without ME (or anyone for that matter) being one who teaches them to split back answers without truly understanding, without truly learning. Every day, my husband and I pray that we will educate our children in such a way that gives Glory to the Lord, and best prepares them for the unique vocation He has for each of them. And this is the path we're being led on. This is where Christ is leading us. Us. Our unique family. And so we leap forward in confidence, looking always to Christ as we go along, and being open to how He leads us.
Friday, September 2, 2011
Time with Kids
I am pondering this quote this morning, from none other than our beloved Holy Father:
A child needs loving attention. This means that we must give children some of our time, the time of our life…To have time and to give time- this is for us a very concrete way to learn to give oneself, to lose oneself in order to find oneself." (Pope Benedict XVI, December 22, 2006)
What a great summary of how the Lord has been leading me. He's been leading, as I mentioned before, in the virtue of simplicity. Exterior simplicity, simplicity of schedule, simplicity of goals, yes...but interior simplicity, simplicity of demeanor (that comes from the heart), and simplicity of faith. How much I can learn from my innocent children about how to have faith.
Today I will look them in their eyes, the gateway to their soul, and seek to give each a few moments of the very unique and personal attention that each desperately and unknowingly needs.
A child needs loving attention. This means that we must give children some of our time, the time of our life…To have time and to give time- this is for us a very concrete way to learn to give oneself, to lose oneself in order to find oneself." (Pope Benedict XVI, December 22, 2006)
What a great summary of how the Lord has been leading me. He's been leading, as I mentioned before, in the virtue of simplicity. Exterior simplicity, simplicity of schedule, simplicity of goals, yes...but interior simplicity, simplicity of demeanor (that comes from the heart), and simplicity of faith. How much I can learn from my innocent children about how to have faith.
Today I will look them in their eyes, the gateway to their soul, and seek to give each a few moments of the very unique and personal attention that each desperately and unknowingly needs.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Baby News! And reflections on questions we're getting used to hearing.
We recently discovered we are pregnant with baby #4! We are thrilled at the news, and our 3 little daughters haven't stopped squealing for joy. They genuine and innocent love and appreciation for new life is refreshing, and inspiring. In a society where more than 2 or 3 kids is seen as "crazy" and "irresponsible," its nice to know we're raising children who know and understand the value of an unborn life. Such people truly are ignorant.
You know what the craziest argument against having "a lot" of kids is? "They are putting too much CO2 into the atmosphere and are using up all the oxygen." Really? See, science teaches us that trees make more oxygen! Also, did God not tell Adam and Eve to "fill the earth and subdue it?" and to "Be fruitful and multiply?" Anyway, that's just one of the absurd things I've heard, in addition to other false assumptions about so-called "over-population" (when really most of the world is NOT replacing its population).
There is absolutely nothing like experiencing a new life within you. This is a gift I treasure. And I can tell you, it doesn't get old. I am so much in love with this baby that I have yet to feel or hold, and I am left in continual awe of the creative power of the Lord. And I'm in awe of my husband. So in love with him!
As you can imagine, with 3 daughters already, and no sons, we are preparing ourselves for the numerous comments we expect to get throughout this pregnancy. Ones such as:
So you're hoping this is a boy, right?
Oh you tried again for a boy!
Oh no, if its a girl, you're POOR husband!
These are all opportunities I know to be a positive witness. But lets be honest, especially when said in front of our 3 daughters, such comments and assumptions are tiresome and can be hurtful. Hurtful, I say, because no one can understand (but us) the immense love we have for our daughters, and how we would consider it to be an honor if our vocation were to raise daughters only in this world. We would not be one bit disappointed to discover its a girl, and its hurtful to think others assume we would be disappointed. Its also hurtful to think that our kids may overhear this and wonder if we would have rather had boys instead of them. I do know that the comment of "oh, poor dad" to my husband is hurtful to him. He loves his daughters more than anything in the world, and says there is NOTHING like when they wrap their little arms around his neck and say "I love you, Daddy, very much." He has said to me that he would absolutely LOVE if we had all girls. What a man!
Would we be excited if its a boy? Absolutely! I know I'd have a lot to learn but it would be an adventure (and that little boy would be totally loved and spoiled by his three big sisters)! We will be equally thrilled if it is a girl. Truly, boy or girl, this is not what's on our mind at this time. I think people assume that all we think about is what we "want" and "prefer" since, you know, we can control our family. Rather, we are finding this news of a new pregnancy an opportunity to re-examine our call to parenthood and to look at our 3 little girls and hug them close. I know this phase of life is fleeting in the grand scheme of eternity, and I want to soak up every minute!
Other typical questions are:
So are you done after this?
How many are you going to have?
I don't mind these questions, really. I think in a society where people are used to planning their family size to an exact science these are typical questions to ask. Also, I think people are genuinely just trying to make conversation and don't mean anything personally. But I've really spent some time reflecting on this. My conclusion comes from some loving advice from a mother of 12 children. Matt had just started graduate school last January, in addition to working full time, and our baby had just started crawling. The 2 year old was having a plethera of tantrums, and the then 4 year old was...well...she's always good. But I was overwhelmed. I had a little mini-break down with some friends, all who happen to be more experienced mothers. I asked them, "If I feel overwhelmed with 3 little ones, how will I ever have 4 or 5 or 8...because we want a big family!" This one mother of 12 said something that I really needed to hear, and didn't expect to hear. She said, with wisdom that can only come from raising 12 children with God's grace:
"I don't think anyone should have as their GOAL to have a big family. Your 'goal' should be to have the number of kids you have right now...because you can't ask for tomorrow's grace today. In other words, you can't imagine having 4 or 5 kids because you don't HAVE 5 kids, and therefore the GRACE isn't there for the asking. Of course the idea seems overwhelming! You do, however, have the grace for your 3 kids. If someday, you have more, God will give you the grace for those, too."
This resonated with both of us, and this idea has influenced our outlook on the matter. We LOVE our now 4 children, and wouldn't trade them for the world. We are grateful and consider ourselves blessed by their presence in our lives. If for some reason, I don't know what...but some reason, we cannot have more children after this then we will be grateful for these 4. I learned a lot from that mother. All I can speak of is the present moment. Right now, I have 3 born children, and 1 in utero, and I ask God every day for the grace to be the mother He needs and they need me to be. Its all about one step at a time. We no longer think of any particular number of kids as our "goal." What we do have as our goal is to have the number of kids that we have RIGHT NOW. Then, in the near future, if that number increases, we would welcome it with joy trusting in God's grace and wisdom!
We also feel blessed to have the guidance of the Holy Church on matters of family planning. Contraception is not an option, sterilization neither. My husband and I love this great adventure of being collaborators with the Lord in His creation! Should we someday be called to have 10-12 kids, we would accept that mission and vocation with joy, having confidence that the Lord does not give us what we cannot handle. But that isn't our "goal." Who knows what the future holds or where the Lord will lead us! Probably, and likely, somewhere we would never expect! But should we prayerfully discern a valid reason to purposely avoid a pregnancy, the Church in her wisdom has an option for us: natural family planning (charting fertility signs and cycles for avoiding or achieving a pregnancy). We always want to do His will. This summer when my cycle returned (I enjoy 13-14 months of ammenoreah, which means no period, while ecologically breastfeeding after a birth), we talked about possibly avoiding a pregnancy for a few months. But it just didn't feel right in our hearts. We trust the Lord's guidance, and we felt excited at whatever adventure lay ahead. And here we are! So grateful for this baby, and looking forward with great anticipation to the joys and trials of adjusting to a growing family! But it was good to go through that discussion period, it drew us closer together, and made us more active participants in following the Lord's will. The funny thing is, we really didn't expect this baby...the timing just didn't seem to line up for a pregnancy...but, the Lord works in many ways, and a baby that's intended by Him is a baby that's created (when the openness to life is there).
Earlier this week I wrote about peace. I do feel so at peace. Maybe its the calm before the storm...I'll let you know:) In the meantime, please remember us in prayer! You are in mine.
You know what the craziest argument against having "a lot" of kids is? "They are putting too much CO2 into the atmosphere and are using up all the oxygen." Really? See, science teaches us that trees make more oxygen! Also, did God not tell Adam and Eve to "fill the earth and subdue it?" and to "Be fruitful and multiply?" Anyway, that's just one of the absurd things I've heard, in addition to other false assumptions about so-called "over-population" (when really most of the world is NOT replacing its population).
There is absolutely nothing like experiencing a new life within you. This is a gift I treasure. And I can tell you, it doesn't get old. I am so much in love with this baby that I have yet to feel or hold, and I am left in continual awe of the creative power of the Lord. And I'm in awe of my husband. So in love with him!
As you can imagine, with 3 daughters already, and no sons, we are preparing ourselves for the numerous comments we expect to get throughout this pregnancy. Ones such as:
So you're hoping this is a boy, right?
Oh you tried again for a boy!
Oh no, if its a girl, you're POOR husband!
These are all opportunities I know to be a positive witness. But lets be honest, especially when said in front of our 3 daughters, such comments and assumptions are tiresome and can be hurtful. Hurtful, I say, because no one can understand (but us) the immense love we have for our daughters, and how we would consider it to be an honor if our vocation were to raise daughters only in this world. We would not be one bit disappointed to discover its a girl, and its hurtful to think others assume we would be disappointed. Its also hurtful to think that our kids may overhear this and wonder if we would have rather had boys instead of them. I do know that the comment of "oh, poor dad" to my husband is hurtful to him. He loves his daughters more than anything in the world, and says there is NOTHING like when they wrap their little arms around his neck and say "I love you, Daddy, very much." He has said to me that he would absolutely LOVE if we had all girls. What a man!
Would we be excited if its a boy? Absolutely! I know I'd have a lot to learn but it would be an adventure (and that little boy would be totally loved and spoiled by his three big sisters)! We will be equally thrilled if it is a girl. Truly, boy or girl, this is not what's on our mind at this time. I think people assume that all we think about is what we "want" and "prefer" since, you know, we can control our family. Rather, we are finding this news of a new pregnancy an opportunity to re-examine our call to parenthood and to look at our 3 little girls and hug them close. I know this phase of life is fleeting in the grand scheme of eternity, and I want to soak up every minute!
Other typical questions are:
So are you done after this?
How many are you going to have?
I don't mind these questions, really. I think in a society where people are used to planning their family size to an exact science these are typical questions to ask. Also, I think people are genuinely just trying to make conversation and don't mean anything personally. But I've really spent some time reflecting on this. My conclusion comes from some loving advice from a mother of 12 children. Matt had just started graduate school last January, in addition to working full time, and our baby had just started crawling. The 2 year old was having a plethera of tantrums, and the then 4 year old was...well...she's always good. But I was overwhelmed. I had a little mini-break down with some friends, all who happen to be more experienced mothers. I asked them, "If I feel overwhelmed with 3 little ones, how will I ever have 4 or 5 or 8...because we want a big family!" This one mother of 12 said something that I really needed to hear, and didn't expect to hear. She said, with wisdom that can only come from raising 12 children with God's grace:
"I don't think anyone should have as their GOAL to have a big family. Your 'goal' should be to have the number of kids you have right now...because you can't ask for tomorrow's grace today. In other words, you can't imagine having 4 or 5 kids because you don't HAVE 5 kids, and therefore the GRACE isn't there for the asking. Of course the idea seems overwhelming! You do, however, have the grace for your 3 kids. If someday, you have more, God will give you the grace for those, too."
This resonated with both of us, and this idea has influenced our outlook on the matter. We LOVE our now 4 children, and wouldn't trade them for the world. We are grateful and consider ourselves blessed by their presence in our lives. If for some reason, I don't know what...but some reason, we cannot have more children after this then we will be grateful for these 4. I learned a lot from that mother. All I can speak of is the present moment. Right now, I have 3 born children, and 1 in utero, and I ask God every day for the grace to be the mother He needs and they need me to be. Its all about one step at a time. We no longer think of any particular number of kids as our "goal." What we do have as our goal is to have the number of kids that we have RIGHT NOW. Then, in the near future, if that number increases, we would welcome it with joy trusting in God's grace and wisdom!
We also feel blessed to have the guidance of the Holy Church on matters of family planning. Contraception is not an option, sterilization neither. My husband and I love this great adventure of being collaborators with the Lord in His creation! Should we someday be called to have 10-12 kids, we would accept that mission and vocation with joy, having confidence that the Lord does not give us what we cannot handle. But that isn't our "goal." Who knows what the future holds or where the Lord will lead us! Probably, and likely, somewhere we would never expect! But should we prayerfully discern a valid reason to purposely avoid a pregnancy, the Church in her wisdom has an option for us: natural family planning (charting fertility signs and cycles for avoiding or achieving a pregnancy). We always want to do His will. This summer when my cycle returned (I enjoy 13-14 months of ammenoreah, which means no period, while ecologically breastfeeding after a birth), we talked about possibly avoiding a pregnancy for a few months. But it just didn't feel right in our hearts. We trust the Lord's guidance, and we felt excited at whatever adventure lay ahead. And here we are! So grateful for this baby, and looking forward with great anticipation to the joys and trials of adjusting to a growing family! But it was good to go through that discussion period, it drew us closer together, and made us more active participants in following the Lord's will. The funny thing is, we really didn't expect this baby...the timing just didn't seem to line up for a pregnancy...but, the Lord works in many ways, and a baby that's intended by Him is a baby that's created (when the openness to life is there).
Earlier this week I wrote about peace. I do feel so at peace. Maybe its the calm before the storm...I'll let you know:) In the meantime, please remember us in prayer! You are in mine.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)